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She waited some more.I wiped the tears as best I could. I took the proverbial deep breath."Jenny, your friendship has been and is a great part of my life. It'sjust,...it's just that I..." My voice trailed off. There had to be aneasier way, but of course there wasn't. "The best way to put this is tosay that I'm not everything I might seem to be." (Was that ever anunderstatement!!) Jenny took one of my hands and held it with both ofhers. The food had come, but it sat there uneaten."Before I came to New York, I had done some modeling for a photographerfriend of mine." Jenny nodded, indicating that she was familiar with thispart of my story, but she didn't say anything. Her smile encouraged me tocontinue. "But I never told you one part of that story. You see when myfriend called me to help him out, I had never worn a dress in my life.You see, I was a man." Silence. Now it was my turn to study my friend'sface to gauge her reaction."Sandi, darling, I didn't know how to say this, but I. " I was afraid of that. Elizabeth, you might want to sit down for this one. You're going to like this even less than Amy liked the news of her 'coming of age' ceremony," I said."Just tell me," Elizabeth retorted impatiently."Ok, you asked for it. Elizabeth, the difference you feel this time is because you are alive again," I told her softly.Elizabeth rolled her eyes."Of course I am. That happens every time I come back. I become 'alive' in my body until it is time to go, then I die again." No honey, you misunderstand me. You are truly, completely alive this time. There is no going back to being dead when you are done. Unless you die again, you are permanently alive again, just as if you had never died," I said as gently as I could. I suspected Amy's reaction a few moments ago would be considered polite compared to what was coming.Elizabeth surprised me. With a stunned and totally shocked look on her face, she sat heavily in the closest chair. Her eyes looked dazed."What? But ... but.
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